Don’t Blame the Reader

Many many years ago, when the world was young and I was younger, an acquaintance asked me to read a book he’d written. I did, and found it… not great. The aspects I enjoyed most were underplayed, and the parts I enjoyed least seemed to get the main focus in the story.

He asked me for an honest review, and when I gave it to him, he wasn’t pleased. He accused me of not understanding his story. He told me I clearly had no idea what he was writing about.

The reaction did not encourage me to read anything else he wrote.

As I’ve connected with more and more authors on social media, I’ve seen some horrific examples of authors not knowing how to interact with their readers.

For instance, about a week ago, an author I had not previously known complained about people reading his books at a library and not buying their own copies. Instead of encouraging people to read his books wherever they might be found, he berated them. And in process, he lost a bunch of potential readers.

Now, to be fair, I’m not an expert at interacting with readers. A few months back (a year? Five? Look, I’m old, apparently, and time is strange) – a while back, I visited an author signing of two authors I’d never met and knew nothing about. My wife wanted to pick up a book, and I’m always game for more books!

I entered the store, and one of the authors recognized me! She was excited to meet me!

I reacted by… running to the back of the store to browse at the sci fi/ fantasy section.

So, as I said, I’m not an expert at this by any means.

But the concept of it seems pretty basic, right? The readers are not your enemy. Don’t blame them.

A reader leaves a bad review? Your book wasn’t for them.

They didn’t like it? That’s fair. I don’t like everything I read!

A reader doesn’t understand what you wrote? I’m pretty sure that happens to everyone. You cannot be so clear in your writing that everyone will get it.

A reader writes terrible things about your mother?

Well, maybe then you can unleash the assassins donated to you by the Hidden Council of Published Ones. (Every author receives five free assassinations upon the release of your first book. After that you have to start paying your dues to the Council.) (If you have published a book and not been contacted by the Council, please talk to your nearest bewildered used bookstore employee.)

Now, it may be that a reader didn’t enjoy your book. It may be they misunderstood your intent. It may be they were complete jerks.

But blaming the reader won’t help you.

First off, it’ll surely lose you that person as a reader. True, perhaps they would never read your work again, but maybe they would have given it another try.

But if your response is public, it’ll sour other readers. And believe me, it’ll get around on social media one way or another. People who might have given you a chance now won’t.

They tell me you need thick skin to be a writer. And it’s true. But how do you handle readers that don’t like your stuff?

Remind yourself that they don’t have to like your stuff. Just like you’re not required to like every piece of media you consume, they don’t have to, either. Remind yourself that they may have fair points about your work. Perhaps it was opaque where you desired transparency. Every writer has places to grow. And remind yourself:

Your worth does not depend on their opinion of you.

And I think that’s why so many writers lash out at their readers. They stake their worth on their books, and so if you are perceived as attacking their books, they think you’re attacking them.

You are not your gift. Your book is a wonderful thing, and I’m glad you’ve written it. But you are not your book. You are so, so much more.

The reader is not your enemy.

Go and write some more. Write for your readers. Give them more things to enjoy.

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